Law Roach, the celebrated stylist behind many of Zendaya’s most memorable red-carpet looks, says he has “outgrown” his pettiness when it comes to fashion brands that once rejected the actress early in her career. During an interview with Ziwe Fumudoh, Roach reflected on the grudges he once held against major fashion houses, saying that holding onto resentment “makes you ugly” and that he has chosen to let some of those feelings go.

Roach previously revealed that he avoided brands including Saint Laurent, Dior, Valentino, Chanel and Gucci after repeatedly being turned down when he asked them to dress Zendaya as a young actress. According to Roach, some told him she was “too green” or not yet important enough for their calendars. He said he kept the “receipts” from those interactions and made a point of not using the brands for Zendaya’s red-carpet appearances.

Although Roach now says he has moved beyond those grudges—he even pointed out that he was wearing Saint Laurent during the interview—he made one thing clear: Zendaya still won’t be wearing those brands on his watch. He explained that while she has worn pieces from some of the fashion houses for editorial shoots, their red-carpet relationship is a different story, particularly because of how they treated her when she was starting out.

Despite the fashion-world drama, Roach and Zendaya’s creative partnership has only grown stronger. Their press-tour looks have included elaborate “method dressing” inspired by her films and characters. Describing their longtime friendship, Roach said they have become “one soul sharing two bodies,” explaining that Zendaya can be his best friend, adviser, opponent or even an annoying little sister.