Hospice nurses spend some of the most difficult hours of their careers beside people nearing the end of life. Over the years, some caregivers say they have noticed certain patterns that appear repeatedly in a patient’s final days or hours. Hospice worker Neal K. Shah has spoken publicly about one especially emotional word he says nurses sometimes hear: “Mum.” ❤️
Shah explains that some dying patients call for their mother or appear to reach toward someone who is not visibly there—even when their mother died decades earlier. His comments connect with research by neurobiologist Dr. Christopher Kerr, whose long-term work with more than 1,400 hospice patients found that many experienced vivid dreams or visions near the end of life. More than 80% reportedly described experiences they found comforting.
Shah believes these moments may reflect the powerful emotional memories formed during early childhood, when a mother or primary caregiver can represent safety and comfort. However, researchers do not have a definitive explanation for why these experiences occur, and they can vary greatly from one person to another. For families, though, the experience can still be deeply meaningful. 🕊️
Shah’s advice to loved ones is simple: don’t immediately correct or argue with a dying person who says they see or hear someone. Instead, caregivers can respond calmly and offer reassurance. “Mum” may not have one universal meaning, but for some families, hearing a loved one call for their mother can become an unexpectedly tender moment during an incredibly difficult goodbye. ❤️